User:Hawk 21

Hawk
Character info
Brawl mains	Falco, Bowser
Other Brawl characters	Captain Falcon, Snake
Personal and other info
Birth date	October 1, 1992
Miscellaneous info
Skill	Above average

'Sup.

Normally, I would have something snarky and totally off-color said here, but, eh, I've got nothin'. Welcome to my page, SmashWiki user...or administrator...or sysop...or bureaucrat...or anonymous someone who I possibly do not know or ever will know. You, my friend, have just stepped into a realm of insanity, death, torture, nonsense, and anti-politically correct irreverence for good measure. Leave now, or forever be AFK.

AHA!!! Gotcha! What I really meant was an open-arm welcome, a roaring fireplace, gentle classical music, food cooked to Gordon Ramsay's satiation, and even a comradely punch in the face, for old time's sake.

Ahem. Now, then...

As far as I can recall, I have been playing the Super Smash Bros. games since the first installment on Nintendo 64 was released, and what fun did we have with that awesome game! As you may or may not have known, the Internet wasn't as ubiquitous back then as it is now. No siree, Bob. Nor did we have online gaming. Unless you were gaming on your computer. Yeah. So, anyway. Uh, where was I? Oh, yeah. We didn't have no fancy online gaming on the Nintendo 64. So, often we would have to do a little thing I like to call "walking", extra controllers and, sometimes, the Super Smash Bros. cartridge in hand (because our buddies often didn't have some characters or stages unlocked) to our friends' houses or apartments.

Two years later, when retailers were first getting the Nintendo GameCube kiosks in the gaming section, we waltzed straight on over to the gaming section of our local Target or Wal-Mart whenever we would get the chance, painfully but resolutely straining our necks to see the televisions, and we first got the chance to play a snippet of Super Smash Bros. Melee. It was, more often than not, the subject of many third grade lunchroom conversations. A year later, I got a Nintendo GameCube for Christmas. Played the bejesus out of Super Mario Sunshine. And then, we got hold of some Melee. It was one of the most played games among my peers for a very long time, until...

March 9, 2008. Trekked over to the local GameStop in my nearby indoor shopping mall that one cold Sunday morning. It was nearly deserted and quiet...TOO quiet. I presented my reserve receipt and walked away with a fresh, hot-off-the-press copy of Super Smash Bros. Brawl. When I got home, I yanked WarioWare: Smooth Moves from my Wii, viciously tore the shrink wrap off Brawl, and SLAMMED the disc into my Nintendo Wii. Okay, so maybe it wasn't that dramatic. The point is, I was exciting, and twenty-one months of waiting was finally going to pay off. I selected the Disc Channel, hit "Start", and soon I was burning through the various single-player modes of Brawl with one of my initial favorite characters -- Fox McCloud. Can't say I was disappointed. It was the main game me and some of my friends played throughout the remainder of high school until we all graduated.

Fast forward to today, and pretty much everyone who uses this site, myself included, is, no doubt, eagerly waiting for some info and release dates on Super Smash Bros. 4 like starving German Shepherds in a deli. Well, nothing we can do about it except do what the Internet usually does and spectate, spectate, spectate.

Hawk's Super Smash Bros. Colloquialisms

Here is a list of oddball names for various things in the Smash Bros. universe that me and some of my friends use (or used to use) on a semi-consistent basis. Just thought I'd throw these out here.

• "Poop"
• "Hug-To-Death"
• "Vacuum"
• "Sparkle"
• "Brick"
• "Donkey Punch"
• "Nail-down"
• "Sparta Kick"
• "Frononut"
• "Butt Slam"
• "Teleport"
• "A** Ram"
• "Steroid Arm (for Dr. Mario and Ganondorf)"
• "Kamehameha Wave"
• "Cheat"
• "Overpowered Hammer"
• "Lawn-mower"
• "Martha"
• "The Clap (for Wario's U-air)"
• "Hammerhead (for Bowser's F-Smash)"
• "Cook"

If you've played any video game starring this character for more than five minutes, you are a furry. You might also have the tendency to write terrible yaoi fan fiction.

Cool story, bro.

HATERS GONNA HATE