User:TheNuttyOne/Palutena's Guidance (SSBD)

Have an idea for a Palutena's Guidance conversation for your newcomer or updated veteran in Project Dream? Feel free to list it here.

(Please keep the list sorted alphabetically!)

Deadpool

Pit: Lady Palutena, who's that?

Deadpool: You're kidding, right? Everyone knows me! I'm Deadpool!

Palutena: That's right Pit, this is Deadpool. He's...well...he's an odd one.

Pit: How so?

Deadpool: Well let me tell you, my good chap! The players need some exposition anyway...

Pit: Um...what? Players?

Deadpool: Shaddap and let me speak! I trained hard for this day to be in Smash, and by trained I mean I was part of an inhumane experiment.

Pit: What happened after that?

Deadpool: Awesomeness, that's what! I was born, and I have come to Smash to spread my love for chimichangas and shooting people to everyone!

Palutena: ...See what I mean?

Genghis Rex

Pit: Who is THAT?

Palutena: I have no data on this fighter. I can't believe it!

Viridi: It must be an intruder from another dimension!

Genghis Rex: Don't treat me like that, idiot-tops!

Pit: He can TALK?!

Palutena: And he doesn't seem very friendly.

Genghis Rex: A goddess? ...Interesting. I can't say you're my target. As for you, winged wimp, take a shot of my Fossilizer and it's game over for you!

Pit: Fossilizer?!

Viridi: Well, if there wasn't something worse for you than not being able to fly, Pit!

Pit: Will my Orbitars be able to reflect his shots, Lady Palutena?

Palutena: Sorry, but you'll have to figure that out yourself this time.

Genghis Rex: Don't tell me you're scared, weakling! Call me your Bossasaur! My roar will shatter any barriers you try to use to defend yourself! Hahahaha!

Pit: I'll have to admit it... I'm scared.

Palutena: Oh, just give it your best shot, Pit. And don't look at those... teeth.

NOTES:

• Genghis Rex's apparent pacifism towards Palutena reflects how he has somewhat of a weakness towards women in Dinosaucers, as he's in love with the only female member of the Dinosaucers, Teryx, whom he does not wish to hurt, and is often scolded by Princess Dei, his sister and the only female member of the Tyrannos, due to the constant failure of his plans, as well as her being far more experienced than him in general.
• The start of the Guidance being the same as for downloadable characters (which reveals that the Guidance's cast has no idea about the character) alludes to Dinosaucers' low fame, due to its status as a cartoon from the 80's with only one season of 65 episodes.
• Genghis Rex uses the phrase "idiot-tops" to insult the Guidance's cast, which is what he would often use in Dinosaucers to insult his compatriots when they commit mistakes.

Mr. AR

Pit: Lady Palutena! This card just... came to life!

Palutena: That's an AR Card, Pit. When they're scanned with the 3DS Camera, a small character will appear. This specific character is Mr. AR, the mascot of the AR Games.

Pit: I don't see a 3DS Camera...

Viridi: It's called video game logic, Pit. Not everything has to make sense. After all, where do you think Wario gets his bike from?

Palutena: Or Peach gets her Toads.

Viridi: Or Yoshi gets his eggs!

Pit: Okay, okay, I get it.

Pokémon Ranger

Pit: Is that a Pokémon Trainer?

Viridi: No, that is a Pokémon RANGER, Pit. They're much better.

Palutena: Oh? What makes you think that, Viridi?

Viridi: Well, they don't force Pokémon to fight each other! They protect Pokémon.

Palutena: But they use their Capture Stylers to have the Pokémon fight to protect other Pokémon for them.

Viridi: But they let them go afterwards.

Pit: Okay, everyone gets it, there's a difference. Can you tell me about my opponent now?

Palutena: The Ranger can summon different Pokémon to attack. Certain Pokémon are more powerful, while others may have better range or speed.

Viridi: But which one appears is randomized.

Pit: So how do I know which one is coming?

Palutena: Just pay close attention. And if all fails, run away!

NOTE: Viridi claims that which Pokémon appears is randomized; however, it actually functions more like the Monado Arts. This is a leftover of an early version of the moves, which were randomized, but they were changed before his release.

Ravio & Sheerow

Pit: It's Nabbit!

Viridi: That's not Nabbit, Pit. That's Ravio and his pet bird Sheerow.

Pit: What's the difference?

Viridi: Well, Nabbit steals items while Ravio sells them.

Pit: So they work together?

Viridi: No!

Viridi: Well... Maybe.

Viridi: But that's not the point! Ravio also lives in Lorule. It's an alternate version of Hyrule.

Pit: Oh, I get it! LOW-rule!

Viridi: Would you just listen? He's Link's Lorulean counterpart, so he has the Lorulean Triforce of Courage.

Pit: He doesn't seem that brave.

Viridi: He isn't. But he's still a force to be reckoned with.

Reckless Wiimote Guy

Pit: Lady Palutena, does Mr. Game & Watch have a brother or a cousin or something?

Palutena: I don't think so. Why?

Pit: Because there's another flat guy!

Viridi: That's Reckless Wiimote Guy, Pit.

Pit: Who would name their kid that?!

Palutena: Well, he doesn't really have a name. He's more of a... a safety warning.

Pit: A safety warning?

Viridi: Just watch out. He doesn't wear a wrist strap.

Pit: Oh. OH!

Retro Mario

Pit: Is that what I think it is?!

Palutena: It sure is, Pit! Mario came all the way from the 1980s just to participate in Smash!

Pit: Wow, this is even cooler than the ACTUAL Mario!

Viridi: It is the actual Mario, Pit. The newer Mario is just a clone.

Pit: What?

Viridi: Everyone knows that 1-Up Mushrooms can't actually revive you. They just spawn a clone of Mario who takes over for him when he dies!

Pit: What?!

Palutena: Now, Viridi, don't spread conspiracy theories as if they're the truth.

Viridi: It IS the truth! Why don't you just ask him?

Pit: I don't think he can talk...

Sales Bunny

Pit: Who is that?

Palutena: I'm not sure. He doesn't look familiar.

Sales Bunny: I'm the Sales Bunny!

Pit: Whoa! You can hear us?

Sales Bunny: Um, yeah! Can't everyone?

Pit: Well, maybe. But they don't usually respond.

Viridi: Pittoo did.

Palutena: And so did Chrom.

Pit: Good point. So why doesn't anyone else ever react?

Sales Bunny: I don't know.

Pit: I wasn't talking to YOU.

Sales Bunny: Oh...

NOTE: Sales Bunny's dialogue appears from a speech bubble on his damage box, like the rest of his dialogue. He will not react to anything else until the Guidance is over.

Shadow

Pit: Is that a…black Sonic?

Palutena: That's Shadow. He uses a combination of guns, motorcycles, and Chaos attacks.

Viridi: Guns? I’ve heard of people using guns, but never hedgehogs…

Pit: So I can just reflect the shots back at him, right? This'll be easy!

Palutena: Not so fast, Pit. Shadow can use Chaos Control to warp to any place at any time. He could just as easily warp right next to you to punish you.

Viridi: But, then again, he couldn't.

Pit: Got it…

NOTE: Palutena's information is technically incorrect; while Shadow can use Chaos Control to warp to any place at any time in the Sonic games, he cannot do so in Smash. Viridi then somewhat corrects Palutena by saying that he could be unable to.

Twilight Sparkle

Pit: Is that a unicorn?

Viridi: Nope, it's an alicorn. Duh.

Palutena: This is Twilight Sparkle. She's the Princess of Friendship.

Pit: Geez, they'll let anyone join the battle these days, huh?

Viridi: What's she gonna do to Pit? Hug him?

Palutena: Don't underestimate this pony, Pit. She's defeated great evils with her friends many times over, saving the world from darkness, ponies' special talents...

Pit: Well, where are these friends?

Starlight: Why, hello there.

Pit: Who are YOU?

Starlight: I'm Starlight Glimmer, Twilight's former foe, but now her student and friend.

Pit: Wait, if you can hijack our conversations, and you're Twilight's STUDENT...

Palutena: Tread with caution, Pit.

Starlight: As someone who's faced off with her before, I'd agree.

Wendy

Pit: Why am I fighting a little girl...?

Warren: Oh, you must be Pit. I've heard about you.

Pit: Huh? Who are you?! And how are you able to contact me?!

Warren: I'm Warren, from Fairy Tail. My magic allows me to contact others using telepathy.

Pit: Oh, like Lady Palutena, right?

Warren: I...guess?

Warren: That aside, that’s Wendy, the Sky Dragon Slayer. She may be young and cute, but she’s very powerful.

Pit: Huh? That little girl…slays dragons?!

Warren: Dragon Slayer Magic is magic taught to humans by actual dragons. In Wendy's case, her dragon was Grandeeney.

Warren: However, the magic actually isn’t powerful enough to slay a dragon…

Warren: But regardless, Wendy should not be underestimated. Her Sky Dragon Crushing Fang and Sky Dragon Claw are very powerful techniques on their own, but her Final Smash is her most devastating attack: her Sky Dragon Roar.

Pit: I’ll be sure to avoid that one…

NOTES:

• Warren's comment about Dragon Slayer Magic not being powerful enough to slay a dragon references how, in the Grand Magic Games arc of Fairy Tail, seven dragons were summoned in a portal from Eclipse, and the seven Dragon Slayers of the series came out to fight them; however, none of them were able to slay a dragon.
• Pit's surprise is similar to the initial reaction everyone gave when first seeing Wendy in the Oración Seis arc.
• This is the only Guidance where neither Palutena nor Viridi appear. Warren himself is, as he says, a user of telepathy magic, which allows him to communicate with others, explaining why/how he appears in the Guidance.

Youngster Joey

Pit: Hi! I like shorts! They're comfy and easy to wear!

Palutena: Is the middle of a battle really the best time to be referencing memes, Pit?

Pit: Sorry, Lady Palutena! Whenever I see a youngster, that's all I can think about.

Viridi: That sentence would be a lot weirder if I didn't know we were talking about Pokémon.

Palutena: Besides, that quote comes from Youngster Ben in Kanto. This is Youngster Joey, from Johto.

Pit: He looks a lot like Ben.

Viridi: But they're VERY different. Ben uses Rattata and Ekans, while Joey just uses Rattata.

Pit: What? Why would he do that? Isn't Rattata, like, super weak or something?

Palutena: Rattata are known for being one of the first Pokémon caught by new trainers, including youngsters like Joey. But Joey's Rattata is like no other. It's like his Rattata is in the top percentage of Rattata.

Pit: Who's referencing memes now?

Viridi: You'd think he'd at least evolve it into Raticate.

Palutena: Speaking of evolving it, Pit, watch out for Rattata's Hyper Beam. It does a lot of damage, but it leaves him unable to move. So dodge quickly, and then strike back while you have the chance.

Pit: Never FEAR!

NOTE: The guidance references the lines "Hi! I like shorts! They're easy and comfortable to wear!" from the Kanto games and Joey's own "It's like my Rattata is in the top percentage of Rattata!", which have reached memetic status. Pit's last quote refers to the F.E.A.R. technique, which stands for Focus Sash, Endeavor, Quick Attack, Rattata, or the more vulgar "F***ing Evil Annoying Rodent.